I am 38 years old now. I think I was about 20 when I first made a list of all my dreams. Through God’s grace, I seem to have achieved it all. I became a lawyer, travelled the world (having gone to more that 5 countries being my goal) or at least a part of the world , married a good man and became the mom of two precious sons. I have all that I need, a beautiful family, a house and our own car and a career I love, I am happy and content. While I know it is time to write down new dreams, my heart is overwhelmed with gratitude for the life I have now.
When I was in highschool, I used to fear the future. In college, I wrote a lot about death and had a morbid fascination with what lies after this life. I don’t know what changed my perspective. All I know is that slowly, life turned out far better than I expected. Whoever that person may be or whatever that experience may be that turned me towards the direction I am now in, I am thankful. Thank you Lord for my 38 years. I pray that you continue to bless me and my family all the days of our lives. Guide us all that we may live a life pleasing to you. Amen.
A feeling of unease, an unsettling in the air. There are moments like these in one’s life. Indeed, life is not perfect and when I feel this way, I take comfort in the song “In Moments Like These” by the Maranatha Singers. Whatever I may be feeling, there is one thing of which I am certain. The Lord loves me and I love Him.
“In moments like these
I sing out a song
I sing out a love song to Jesus
In moments like these
I lift up my hands
I lift up my hands to the Lord
Singing I love you Lord
Singing I love you Lord
Singing I love you Lord
Singing I love you”
Thank you for your enduring love Lord. I pray that you continue to bless me and my family as we try to live a life pleasing to you. I surrender all my cares and ill feelings to you Lord. Amen.
Hubby is joining the Capiz Triaksyon, a triathlon organized by the Capiz government and I’ve been for nice places to eat in Capiz. I’ve noticed though that there are fewer blogs out in the google results page. Nowadays, people often just share their favorite trips/eats in their social media accounts. It’s such a shame. While I seldom blogged, I loved reading blogs. I like how you could just silently and vicariously live through the experience of someone else without the fanfare of say a “million” other people chiming in their thoughts or the noise that come with a vlog.
Come back bloggers, the world needs you…I need you.
Two days ago I went to the ER after I felt prickling in my nape. True enough, my blood pressure shot up. It seemed that the post-partum hypertension I had been diagnosed with a month after giving birth was back.
On a regular check-up to my OB-GYNE, my bp was measured at 150/100. After that, I took maintenance meds for about two weeks, lay low on taking care of the baby at night and tried to get enough sleep but I didn’t change my diet rationalizing that I did not need to because I was still breastfeeding at that time.
This time, I really have to change my lifestyle for myself and most especially for my family. Thank you for this wake up call Lord. I know it isn’t too late yet. Bless my days. Help me that I may achieve a work-life balance and that I may live a life pleasing to you. Amen.
“In everything you do, put God first, and he will direct you and crown your efforts with success.” Proverbs 3:6
I thank you Lord for my beautiful life. I pray that you make me your instrument. May all my works always be guided by your hand.
On a long weekend with my old housemates, I realized how I’ve missed blogging. I miss being alone with my thoughts. I realize now that writing calms me, it gives my day purpose. It allows me to do more than just juggle family and career and instead do things intentionally.
Thank you Lord for reminding me of this part of myself that I shouldn’t let go. Thank you for this gift. Amen.
Recently, an incident involved me calling out a person for interference in something said person was not responsible for. I was surprised at the vehemence with which I spoke. Afterward, I felt a little guilty. I asked myself if it was the right thing to do. I seldom speak in anger or in whatever strong emotion and am often described as a mild-mannered, soft-spoken person. That person didn’t feel like me.
Then again, I prayed for the gift of wisdom in discourse and eventually because I called out that person, said person left, and the matter was resolved. Maybe, these are the changes I need in my life. I pray Lord for your continued guidance. I pray for wisdom and discernment. Thank you Lord for a wonderful family, a fulfilling career and a new religious community and of course our coming new baby. We offer all that we do to you. Amen.
E is turning four in two months and he’s one creative and imaginative kid. Yesterday, I overheard him and his Daddy arguing over who the guy in green (in his superhero book) was. E insisted, “That’s Green Lantern because he’s wearing green” while his dad insisted, “No, that’s Mr. Octopus.” I’m glad that he’s so sure of himself and a little bit cocky some of the time. Like telling me that an Octopus has four tentacles then clarifying that he was talking about Mr. Octopus and not a real one.
Earlier, he was pretending he was a master builder building things out of his Lego (and he hasn’t even seen movie yet),” oh Dad, you have to build something to cross a river full of punching frogs, or Dad, I used my tool to raise the water up so you can’t cross.” We can’t keep up with all the names he has given these machines he has been making. In my heart, I say a quick thank you to our Lord for giving me a hubby who makes time to play with our little-big boy.
Our son is a sponge and is so receptive that I have to be careful with what I say. He calls our new P a bad man (My, oh my, I wonder where he heard that.) and has now taken to saving up money for KinderJoy for our trip visit Tita Mimin. It is a joy learning with E and growing as parents with hubby.
Which brings me to my title “Jesse Tree”. I commit to doing this this Christmas. It is a beautiful way of commemorating the birth of our Lord and I can’t wait to begin. So this is me, motherhood has cured me of my restlessness or rather allowed me to redirect it. That’s why whenever I feel the lure of procrastination, I look for stuff to do with E and I’m motivated again.
It is back again. Maybe I am just too excited for tomorrow’s trip. Maybe I am just overwhelmed by all the changes/happenings in my life, M’s wedding, Manang A’s arrival, a temporary LDR relationship with H, N and H’s 70th birthdays or maybe it is just as simple as E not adjusting to preschool so well. Now that I’ve written it here, I think it is the simplest answer, I am restless because E is unhappy. How the mighty have fallen. I always told myself I wouldn’t be that kind of mom but I am becoming one….his happiness really is my own too.
I have to reassure him that his Dad will be back and soon enough. Just 45 more days and he will be back home with us. I guess this is the main stressor that has had him become a clingier version of himself. I pray for patience Lord. I know I haven’t been patient with him as I should have. Thank you for this reminder of my weakness. Bless me Lord, give me the grace to be a better parent. Amen.
Since hubby’s schedule is erratic, we often find ourselves “catching mass” like you do with movie schedules. It’s been a year since we moved to Iloilo, I feel it’s about time we knew the mass schedules in the city . Thus, I went around Iloilo to get the schedules and promised myself I would post it here. (A websearch I did on Iloilo mass schedules returned negative results and this post should correct that lack of information) Thank you for today, Lord.