A Retelling of Life

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A New Chapter

We are together now.  After four years and five months of a long distance marriage, H and I are finally moving in together.  E will grow up in a two-parent home.  Tonight, we will be fixing our new home.  I pray that the Lord will guide us so that we will thrive in our new home.

We left the house we boughtwhen we first found out I was pregnant with Ethan. The house that witnessed the growing pains of a new family.  I will miss our old life, the afternoon walks around our subdivision, the visits to our neighbor’s pet monkeys, birds and iguana.  Santorini-the place where our hopes and dreams were built.

As of June 1, 2015, a new family will be ushered in.  While I am saddened by this change, I too am excited about the direction our life is taking.  H and I are free to build a life together now in each others arms.  Life is good indeed.

She Walks in Starlight

Dear Music,

I have missed you.  Since my son was born, I have been relegated to Disney tunes and nursery rhymes.  While the most beautiful sound to me is still the sound of my son humming and supplying the words to his favorite songs, I miss the gripping choke-hold on my heart that a haunting song evokes.

Two years later, you found your way to my heart again.  I rejoice in your beauty, I rejoice in your resilience, I rejoice in your strength.  Indeed, you are one of God’s greatest gifts to man.

Thank you for awakening my spirit.

Love, me.

Surrender

The hammering goes on in the next room.  A noisy reminder of how life is a cacophany of sounds.  Like the little boy in August Rush, I have moments when events seem to be set to a musical score.  Some days are magical, a “Walking on Sunshine” kind of day when everything goes well and some days are set in haunting melancholy.

Yesterday, was  a day of victory.  My mom’s PET scan results confirm that she is cancer-free!  I still get teary-eyed when I think of that..”cancer-free”, “cancer-survivor”, these are words are family has been waiting for since that very first day when she was diagnosed with Hodgkins.  It was a “Hallelujah” kind of day.

I write again to express my deep gratitude to our Lord.  I do not know why some survive cancer while some don’t.  That is the mystery of God’s plan for us all.  What I am certain of is this:  the Lord still has a lot of plans for Mommy and for our family.  I now bear witness to the Lord’s mercy and compassion, to the fact that trials are blessings in disguise.  Our family has emerged stronger in faith and in love.  We have sought different ways in dealing with the Big C in the family but all those ways have led us to the realization that in the end, after all the medical treatments, we have one God to turn to, our Divine Healer.

I thank Mama Mary for interceding for Mommy.  After all these years of Christian Doctrine, I now appreciate Mama Mary fully as the Mother of Jesus.  My mom has always looked to Mary as inspiration, and I see in my mom, the great faith, selflessness and humility that exemplified Mama Mary and endeared her to her son, our Lord Jesus Christ.

I pray that the Lord will use me to do His good work on earth.  I am ready Lord.  Thank you for this crazy, beautiful life. Amen.

The Poetry of Daily Life

I’m finally watching Before Sunrise again. I’m watching out of nostalgia, an appreciation of things past, gratitude for the present and excitement for the future. I’m still waiting for that train ride though, not with a stranger from the train…but with my little family. Cheers to a life of no regrets. 🙂

Sensory Play with E.

I’ve been pinning sensory play ideas for months now. Today, a hundred pins later, I succeeded in giving E a sensory experience that kept him occupied for a good number of minutes. I started off with the most commonplace items you’ll find-rocks. E and I gathered stones of different sizes. After a thorough cleaning ( you never know what lay with the stones), we put it in a Fisher Price table (c/o my thoughtful sis in law) repurposed for this activity. I started off with putting a dino among the rocks. I also placed a little container with water. E started off with putting rocks in the water. Later, when I mentioned that his little Dino must be thirsty, he happily made dino drink water. A little later, he tried to fit frog in the little container, maybe thinking that his frog needed a drink too. Lol. The activity kept him busy for about 15 minutes. I pronounce the activity as a success! 🙂

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A Year in A Flash

Two weeks ago, our baby became a toddler! There have been marked changes in his behavior. He is now a little boy with strong likes and dislikes. Since he can now walk, like a tiny sized adult, he insists on doing things on his own.

Already, I miss the hours I spent cuddling him and cradling him in my arms. When I pick him up, a minute tops and he’s raring to be put down so he can resume his walking. He’s such a busy toddler. His toys can only keep his attention for a few minutes as he prefers to play where we dare not let him go and venture to the land of the “NO ETHAN!”s. The bathroom, the garbage can, the stove, the front door and the rice cooker, these are on top of his list of “to go/to do”.

Indeed, a child is a bundle of joy. Our days are filled with his shrieks of laughter and bubbly giggles. I thank the Lord for our little boy whose one year just went in a flash.

For his first year birthday, we thought of a birthday that would celebrate the first twelve months of his life. His Tita Lore came up with “A Year in A Flash” birthday that combined the elements of fun, celebration and adventure. Our little explorer loved his party and we have his photos to show to him when he’s a little older. (Photos to follow..internet is pretty slow at this hour).

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Sonata In My Mind

Sometimes you come across a movie that stays imprinted in you.  You wake up the following day still feeling the hum of the background sonata reverberating in your mind.   Sonata is one such movie.

I went to watch Sonata with no expectations. I hadn’t read any reviews and all I knew was that it was directed by Peque Gallaga and Lore Reyes and was supposed to be an ode to Negros.  The film got off to a slow start.  In the beginning, I caught myself looking at my watch wondering how many minutes it would take to pick up.  Midway, I was hooked.  The precious friendship between Regina and Jonjon tugged at my heart.  I laughed and cried with the entire audience at the antics of Don Giovanni  and Pinkerton.  The stellar performances of the actors, the breathtaking scenes of Negros and the haunting background music came together to produce a wonderful cinematic experience.  

This is why I go to the movies, to lose myself in someone else’s life and forget my own for a short while, to laugh and cry and feel, to celebrate everything that makes us human.  I don’t think there was a dry eye at the theater last night.  =) Thank you Sonata for a good cry and for reminding us that indeed, it is a beautiful life. 

I’ll Love You Forever

“I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I’m living my baby you’ll be.” Robert Munsch

Tonight, I arrived home from work pretty exhausted. I had a whole morning full of hearings and an afternoon spent preparing a position paper. There was just so much more that needed to be done. Work does get overwhelming sometimes. I have another round of hearings tomorrow and I am weary just thinking about it.

I get home and go straight to baby Ethan’s room. He looks so peaceful in his sleep, like he’s resting on clouds and walking on rainbows. I gaze at him and catch him smiling just as if he’s seeing fluffy dogs and adorable cats – seeing the kind of things beautiful dreams are made of. The weariness is lifted off my shoulders. I am reminded of how rich and wonderful the world is. Indeed, how wonderful or miserable your life is depends on your perspective.

I realize how shallow I was to complain about work. I am blessed to have a job where I am paid to help people. I have a little boy who looks at me like I am the world to him. I have a hubby who keeps encouraging me to go biking/swimming and running with him (because it just is so much fun to do all these strenuous activities…(hehe). In other words, I am loved…

I say a quick word of thanks to the Lord for the reminder. I have so many concerns but my God so much bigger. I cast all my cares upon Him. Tonight, I will sleep well. He will take care of me and of my problems just as He has done my entire life. I have nothing to fear.

Becoming The Uncommon Reader

The Uncommon Reader

“The Uncommon Reader” is the first book I’ve heartily enjoyed in ages.  I found myself laughing out loud at the awkward reactions of Her Majesty’s staff to the Queen’s sudden love for reading.  Since Ethan, I haven’t really had the time to read for myself.  I’ve read tons of children’s stories and parenting how to’s but I haven’t gotten stuck in a book as I often was in the good old days.   The Uncommon Reader brought me back to that place, that magical space where only you and your imagination exist.  Indeed, “A book is a device to ignite the imagination.”

And so I’ve decided to resume my reading again.  After all, as noted by the queen, “Books are not about passing time. They’re about other lives. Other worlds. Far from wanting time to pass, one just wishes one had more of it. If one wanted to pass the time one could go to New Zealand.”  Happy Reading! 🙂

Discovering Swim Bike Mom a.k.a. Margaret Atwood

Before summer officially ended, hubby and I went to Boracay on a quick beach vacation.  Hubby biked all the way from Iloilo City to Boracay via Antique while I rode in a van with the wife of one of his bike buddies.  Yup, hubby is crazy about biking and so are about 7 or so of his other friends,  crazy enough to wake up at 2:00 in the morning to ride all the way to Caticlan.

Hard core stuff, I know.  I must imagine it must give you a different high to travel all 250 kms or so and know that you did it solely with your bike powered your two human legs.  I am proud of him.  I often wonder if I too can do it, if  I too can push myself to the limit, given my desire for shortcuts.

Yes, I was an athlete in high school.  I did track, 100 m dash, 200 m dash, 400 m dash, long jump and high jump…but marathons weren’t something I particularly excelled at or enjoyed.  Even in life, I have trouble preparing for life like a marathon..everyday is a short distance race for me.  My mantra is to take each day as it comes.  I have a vague view of the near future and I’m okay with that.  I entrust everything to the Lord, and I go where the wind blows.  So far, this has worked out for me.  Lawyering, marriage, motherhood, they were all just vague ideas that eventually came to fruition when the time was right.  But, I digress!

This post is not about life but about running marathons and completing triathlons.  Hubby has been slowly convincing me to embrace the triathlete life.  He’s struggling with his swimming but he’s slowly getting there.  As for me, I have to work on all three..biking especially since it really has been more pain than fun for me so far. 🙂  Hubby’s convincing didn’t really make an impression on me until I chanced upon a blog mentioning Meredith Atwood of swimbikemom  (http://www.swimbikemom.com/) fame.   She is an inspiration to mothers and women everywhere.  Indeed,  there just might be a triathlete inside us all.

I’m hoping that this time next year, I’ll be able to share tips to would be triathletes.  That’s quite a tall order but time will tell if I’ll actually be able to do it.

On that note, I thank the Lord for sports.  Where else an we get a free dose of happy hormones. =)

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